


Bedfellows

by orphan_account



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, M/M, Roommates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-21
Updated: 2017-06-21
Packaged: 2018-11-16 20:55:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,735
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11260824
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Alfred thinks his roommate might be homophobic, but it turns out Ivan just doesn't like seeing Alfred with any other guy but him. Based on a tumblr prompt.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Reposted from my tumblr

It took _a lot_ to get Ivan mad—okay, maybe that was a lie…

Ahem.

It takes a _slightly inconveniencing amount_  to arouse Ivan’s rage…

There. Better.

It takes a slightly inconveniencing amount to arouse Ivan’s rage, thus it was within the realms of reason why he was absolutely livid in that moment.

There it was, for the second goddamn night in a row, a sock on his doorknob.

Fists clenched, eyes narrowed, he cursed his roommate. Did he really have to have yet another “dick appointment”, as he’d taken to calling them, on the night before Ivan’s exam?

He had just as much right to his room as Alfred did—they’d signed a cheesy roommate contract at the request of their RA in the fall saying just that! Ever since Alfred got that new boyfriend, they were constantly getting it on. Ivan knew they were hooking up even more often than the nights he was sexiled, too, as there was many a night where Alfred didn’t return till the next day having spent the night at Arthur’s…

He seethed at the name. How dare this irrelevant person take Alfred’s attention away from him? His best friend! It wasn’t fair. Sure, they fought a lot, most outsiders would think them enemies, but both of them had grown so close that year, from the fated, random assignment to the present day.

Not giving one fuck about what he may witness, Ivan removed the sock, tossing it down the hallway—he hoped Alfred never found it again—and unlocked the door.

He was promptly met with a “Dude!” and a “Good heavens” from Alfred and Arthur, respectively. Thankfully the couple weren’t too engaged in each other at the moment, merely cuddling on the futon while watching Netflix on Alfred’s laptop.

“Oh, hello Ivan,” Arthur said. Ivan knew he shouldn’t hate the man, he was nothing but polite to him when they spoke, but he glared nonetheless.

“Ivan, did you not get the memo?” Alfred groaned.

“I did, but I chose to ignore it. I need to sleep tonight. You know I have an exam tomorrow.”

“Ivan,” he whined. “Not cool.”

“I don’t make the schedule, Alfred.”

“Oh, well, if that’s the case, I should head out,” Arthur remarked. Untwining himself from Alfred’s vice-like grip, he stood before gathering his things in his bag.

“Thank you,” Ivan said through his teeth.

Arthur kissed Alfred goodnight then headed for the door, politely wishing Ivan good luck on his test.

“Dude, what’s up with the cock-blocking?” Alfred asked once the door shut.

“You had the room last night. It’s not fair,” he pouted, sounding like a petulant child.

“Sorry, but I have a boyfriend now. We’re in the honeymoon phase, you know? AKA lots of sex.”

“TMI.”

He laughed. “Aw, don’t be jealous! Just ‘cause that one Canadian girl hasn’t texted you back,” he teased. “Sorry some of us actually have game.”

“I have game,” he insisted.

“Bitch where?”

“Shut up,” he tossed his bag on his desk chair. Slipping out of his coat and scarf, he turned to his roommate. “What were you watching?”

“We were about to watch this new anime Kiku recommended,” he said, referring to his and Arthur’s mutual friend. “Since I won’t be getting it tonight, you are now obligated to watch with me.”

“I have to sleep.”

“Just one episode!” he begged. “It’s only, like, twenty minutes.”

“Fine,” he huffed.

Alfred cheered. “Excellent. While you’re up, get me a beer, would you?”

Grumbling in his mother tongue about Alfred’s laziness, Ivan obeyed. He plopped down next to Alfred, annoyed that he’d been forced into sitting on the springless, uncomfortable portion of the futon.

“What’s this about?” he asked while opening his beer.

After a hefty sip and a dramatic smacking of lips, Alfred replied. “Not sure. It’s supposed to be super gay, though.”

Ivan shifted uncomfortably. “I don’t know if I want to watch that, then.”

Alfred smiled, but his eyes seemed guarded. “You don’t have to if you don’t want to.”

“No, it’s fine. But, two episodes max. I have to sleep.”

They ended up watching four episodes, much to Ivan’s disappointment. He had poor self-control, and Alfred was an expert at egging him on. Luckily, he was still able to get a good night’s rest thanks to the relaxing effects of the alcohol, and he made it to his exam on time.

He returned to the room in the late afternoon and his good day was ruined by witnessing Alfred and Arthur making out on the couch. He shut the door loudly behind him, but even that wasn’t enough to thwart their efforts to become one contiguous being. In most cases of PDA, Ivan was quick to look away, but there was something about _Alfred_ kissing that kept his attention. Perhaps it was how into it he always was; even if it was just with some guy he’d met ten minutes before at a party or someone he’d been crushing on for ages, he was so enthusiastic, so eager to please. Ivan wouldn’t admit it to anyone, of course, but whenever they went out together, he almost looked forward to seeing who Alfred would latch his lips onto.

Not that he looked forward to it happening in his own damn room, though. He also didn’t quite like the sheer volume of guys Alfred blew through… and just plain blew, at that. Surely he was getting a reputation in the gay community on campus. Didn’t he care about that? He was surprised he’d even managed to get a boyfriend, honestly, since he didn’t seem like the commitment type.

Finally, Arthur seemed to notice the newcomer and pulled back just as Alfred’s hand snaked itself under his shirt. He let out a mix between a snort and a gasp at that, a sound that Alfred found amusing judging by his laughter.

“Alfred,” Arthur warned. “Your roommate’s here.”

 _Lovely_ , Ivan thought. _I’m just ‘the roommate’. At least use my damn name._

“Oh, hey Ivan!” Alfred didn’t seem apologetic. “How was the exam?”

“Good,” he replied. Alfred didn’t make any attempt to remove Arthur from his lap, but they were no longer kissing.

“Sweet. Hey! Art and I were about to head to dinner, wanna join?”

“Dinner?” he hit a button on his phone to check the time. “It’s a bit early.”

“Yeah,” he smiled. “Artie here’s an old man who likes to eat at, like, four-thirty.”

“I don’t know,” Ivan began.

“Oh, come on! We haven’t had our roomie dinner in forever!”

 _Probably because you keep ditching me for your stupid boyfriend_ , he noted internally. “Fine, let’s go.”

“Cool!” He stood, showing off his strength by holding Arthur up by his legs. The smaller man shrieked at the change in elevation and clung to Alfred’s neck.

“Let me down at once, Al! What the hell?”

“I can’t hear you, babe,” Alfred smirked. He placed a loud, obnoxious kiss to Arthur’s lips, Ivan watching all the while, before not-so-gently throwing him onto his bed.

“Rude,” Arthur commented, though a soft smile and a blush betrayed his true sentiments. The man was always rather reticent, in Ivan’s opinion, a stark contrast to Alfred’s filterless ramblings.

The trio walked to the dining hall, Alfred and Arthur holding hands and laughing at some inside joke while Ivan third-wheeled hardcore. Whenever he had Alfred’s attention, he cherished the smiles and laughs he earned. But, they were short-lived, as soon Alfred would turn to Arthur and attempt to flirt or say something inappropriate.

They parted, with the couple heading to Arthur’s dorm and Ivan back to his room. Alone and a bit moody, he downed a few beers while doing his homework before falling asleep.

For a few weeks, things proceeded in a similar fashion. Alfred was all about Arthur, it seemed. Arthur never did anything rude to Ivan intentionally, he knew any disrespect was all Alfred’s doing, but still Ivan didn’t like him. He didn’t think he deserved Alfred’s affections; none of the guys he so often went after did. Ivan had dealt with a gloomy Alfred on more than one occasion, after all, and he knew how the other struggled with reconciling his more promiscuous side with his want for something continuous. While Alfred hadn’t gone out of his way to find a boyfriend, he’d been open to it when Arthur asked him on a study date after a one-night stand, and the rest was history.

It was near the middle of the semester that Alfred, serious look on his face for once, asked Ivan if they could talk.

“So,” he began. “Room picks are coming up.”

“Are they?” he hummed. “Do you think we’ll get a good number? The upperclassmen get first pick, don’t they? Where do you—”

“I don’t think we should room together.”

Ivan’s mouth froze mid-question. Alfred wasn’t smiling, nor did he look like he was kidding. “I… but why? I thought… things were going well…”

“They were, but you’ve been super weird. Ever since I’ve been dating Arthur, actually.”

“Can you blame me? You only ever spend time with him! We’re friends!”

“And he’s my _boyfriend._ He’s important to me.”

Ivan scoffed. “I still don’t understand what you see in him.”

“What?”

“He doesn’t get your humor, he’s so dull, can’t hold his liquor, and he doesn’t like the things you do! Why are you even dating him?”

“What do you—“

“I mean, you’ve slept with, like, all the guys here anyway. Surely by now you could’ve found someone better suited—“

“Dude!” he yelled. “What the hell? Low-blow! What’s your problem?”

“I don’t have a problem,” he frowned. “I just don’t understand why you don’t think we should room together. We… you’re one of my best friends.”

“I know… I consider you a good friend, too, but, sometimes, friends are better not being around each other 24/7, you know?”

“You’re hardly around, like… 16/5!”

“What?”

“Nevermind! Fine, go room with Arthur, then! Or, when you two break up since you inevitably will, go run off to any of your boy toys you keep around!”

“Ivan…” eyes narrowed, he rose, trying to appear slightly intimidating. “Why are you acting like this? You weren’t this annoying first semester! Why? Is it different now that you know I’m not running off with girls but with guys?”

“What?” Ivan rose as well, his taller frame giving him the advantage.

“Yeah, don’t think I haven’t noticed,” he poked Ivan’s chest. “Whenever I spent the night away before coming out to you, you were all ears! So proud that your friend was putting himself out there! But, now, you skirt around the topic, you hate hearing about who I’m hooking up with, you insult Arthur and everyone else… they’ve told me what you’ve said! You tell guys not to even bother flirting with me, even tell people you don’t think I’m gay. Are you embarrassed of me? To be associated with me? You’re not supportive of me at all!”

“You… you think…”

“I think you’re just a homophobic asshole! Well, sorry, Ivan, but I’m gay, and that’s not going to change! If you can’t get over that, then I don’t even want to friends with you! It’s all of me or none!”

Still startled by his roommate’s accusations, Ivan didn’t respond. With a huff, Alfred packed his bag and left, most likely for Arthur’s, Ivan assumed.

He fell to the couch in a sad heap, mind racing. How could Alfred think he was like that? He… he wasn’t homophobic at all! He didn’t care that Alfred was gay; in fact, he’d much rather see him making out with guys than with girls!

Wait—that’s kind of weird…

Regardless! This was all a misunderstanding. He groaned, regretting how harsh he had sounded. Alfred wasn’t completely wrong; Ivan _did_ try to get all those leeches off of him, but it wasn’t because he thought those relations gross… it was because Alfred shouldn’t even consider deigning himself by hooking up with _any_ of them. None of them were good enough! Surely he knew that! Ivan never understood why he was always so upset when those losers didn’t text him back, or worse, only did when they were drunk… it was his lack of confidence that had coaxed him into this boring relationship with Arthur, Ivan knew. Alfred genuinely believed that Arthur was the only one around who wasn’t going to use him simply for sex.

Preposterous! While Ivan couldn’t think of someone off the top of his head that could match Alfred tit-for-tat, he knew there was somebody out there just right for him, and it certainly wasn’t any of these people who only tried to get to know him because they wanted a fuck buddy. Why couldn’t people just see what Ivan saw, namely that Alfred was perfect? He was handsome, hilarious, kind, charming, witty, smart, all-around gorgeous, with the most beautiful blue eyes, fantastic musculature, modelesque features…

Ivan paled. He stood, paced about, then sat back down, rubbing at his weary eyes.

Ah, he wasn’t homophobic, not in the slightest.

He was simply gay as fuck for his roommate.


	2. Chapter 2

As his emotional maturity dictated, Ivan chose to avoid Alfred for the next week. He didn’t even chat with any of their mutual friends, as he was sure that Alfred had already told them of his theory and, since most of them identified as LGBQ, he figured they wouldn’t be on his side.

His savior came in the form of his go-to study partner, a fellow freshman named Yao Wang, who refused to let Ivan dodge him for the third night in a row.

Holed up in his favorite study spot in one of the lesser used libraries, Yao found him. Ivan tried to ignore him, but given that he was facing the only point of entry and no one else was around it was to no avail.

“Dick,” he began. With a bit more force than necessary, he thwacked Ivan on the back of the head.

He rubbed the spot with a soft glare. “So you heard.”

“I heard Alfred’s side. And Arthur’s—he had quite a bit to say, actually. But, I know that both of them are prone to… er… exaggerating, so I wanted to hear from you.”

“I thought you didn’t like Alfred?”

“What do you mean? I love Alfred. He’s a dependable source of income. Every weekend we go out, he gets sloshed, I convince him that I paid for his cover, cabs, drinks… then he pays me back by Wednesday. I value his friendship. Plus, he can be funny at times.”

Ivan rolled his eyes. “And what exactly is his side of the story?”

Yao sat across from him, taking out his laptop. “He just said you’re a homophobic jerk. Nothing too crazy. He was more sad than anything.”

“He seemed angry with me.”

“That’d be understandable, if it’s true.”

“It’s not.”

“I know. We all know. He forgets that you’re also friends with Gilbert, me, Kiku, and Francis, too. You’ve never batted an eye at any of us. In fact, you’ve been my wingman on more than one occasion.”

“Well, obviously it’s not true,” he huffed. “Why did you hit me, then?”

Yao chose to ignore the question. “The problem then, is Arthur.”

“How?”

“He’s the one that put the idea in Alfred’s head, originally.”

“Why the hell would he do that?”

“Jealousy, I assume.”

“Jealous?” he pouted. “Of who?”

“You.”

“Me?”

“Are you deaf? Yes, you! Of all the people on campus, you’re the only person who’s been with Alfred through everything. You know of course that he goes through flings like none other, but then there’s you. You’ve been a constant for him. Arthur is threatened by that.”

“Are you sure? I… that doesn’t really make sense to me.” He decided to change the direction of the conversation. “Why are you ratting Arthur out like this? I thought you were friends?”

He snorted. “Oh, sure, we used to be, but now, he’s a dick. He’s a total control freak! Every time I get a new friend, he’s there, trying to make them like mini clones of him, even if they’re more like me! He’s got a lot of influence over the gaybies, surprisingly, since he’s an upperclassman.”

“He does? I’d never heard of him till Alfred and him hooked up, honestly.”

“He keeps a low profile. People know not to talk shit about him.”

“I see.” He paused, considering the words.

“Anyway,” Yao broke his train of thought. “What exactly is your problem with Alfred and Arthur, then, since it’s clearly not the gay part that’s bothering you.”

“Huh?”

“I mean, sure, Arthur’s not the best, but he makes Alfred happy, doesn’t he? Isn’t that good enough? You should support him as a friend.”

“What? You just said Arthur was a dick!”

“I know, but, to be fair, Alfred likes dick.”

He laughed. “I’m just looking out for him, is all. He has poor taste.”

“What? And yours is much better? When’s the last time you had a good date?”

“That’s different. Besides, I’m not trying to date; if I was focused on them, it’d be different.”

“And what, then, has your focus?” he smirked, seeming like he already knew the answer.

Ivan narrowed his eyes. “You seem like you’re in on a joke.”

“Oh, it’s not a joke. Just an observation.”

“Care to share?”

“It’s funnier to watch you squirm,” he turned his attention to his laptop. “Oh, a new Buzzfeed quiz, how fun.”

“Yao…” he warned.

He hummed. “Yes, Ivan?”

“Stop being annoying.”

“It’s a habit at this point.”

“What do you think has my focus?”

“It’s not a ‘what’, but a ‘who’.”

Ivan responded by flushing, lowering his face as if he was actually set on reading his Chemistry textbook—fat chance.

“Aw, are you blushing?” Yao teased. “I can read you much better than you can read that dusty book.”

“That’s not that impressive,” he mused. “It’s a boring-ass book.”

“True,” he chirped. “So, when are you gonna tell him?”

“I have no idea what or whom you’re talking about.”

“Come on, dude! It makes so much sense. I always thought there was that weird tension between you two, even though you just scream ‘breeder’ and he screams… well, a lot, from what I’ve heard.”

“That’s none of your business!” he yelled.

“Careful, Ivey, it’s a library.”

He bristled at the nickname. Only Alfred could call him that without repercussions. “Don’t call me that.”

“Why not, Ivey?” he grinned. “Is that only a pet name your boyfriend can use?”

Instead of swinging, as Yao was prepared for, Ivan fell forward, burying his face in his arms. “Can we not talk about this?” though muffled, his words came through. “He totally hates me, anyway.”

“Oh, dude, are you crying?”

He shook his head. “Of course not. I just don’t wanna look at you.”

“Oh, got it. Well, here’s the thing, you should straighten—er, _not_ straighten? Whatever—this out sooner rather than later, or else Alfred will end up rooming with Arthur! Now that’s a kettle set to boil over if I ever saw one. No way Alfred could put up with Arthur’s shit for much longer.”

“And what on earth do you want me to do?”

“Easy. Tell him.”

“No.”

“Dude!”

“I said no,” he repeated.

“Well, you know Alfred—he can’t read people too well. If you don’t tell him, he’ll never know.”

“Maybe that’s for the best.”

That earned him another smack to the head. “Idiot. I’m sick of seeing you all mopey. For some odd reason, you two are meant to be!”

“You don’t know that.”

“No, but I feel that. And, you have your own feelings, too. Don’t ignore them.”

“It’s easier to do just that,” he frowned. “What if he doesn’t even see me like that? And what about Arthur? I don’t want to just tear them apart.”

“Well, at the very least, you gotta get your friend back. Tell him that you’re not homophobic, just worried for him.”

“If I do that, I probably couldn’t stop,” he confessed. “I’m not big on talking about feelings, and it’d probably just become pure word vomit.”

Yao shrugged. “Maybe that’s what you two need.”

“I don’t know…”

“Christ, you’re hopeless… don’t you want to be happy?”

“Of course… but… I don’t know… he’s just… so experienced. And I’m not.”

“What, with guys?”

“Not just that. I’ve never even dated anyone.”

“Well, hella people thought you two were dating before, anyway, so just act like that.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, you were super protective of him, you spent every free hour together… had tons of silly names and jokes and fought a bunch but never too seriously… if that’s not couple stuff, then I dunno what is. Oh, but then you can, like, makeout with him too whenever.”

“It’s no wonder you’re not dating anyone,” he groaned.

Yao only laughed. “Well I’m not the one who went and fell for the schools’ gayest playboy, now am I?”

“I suppose you’re not.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll totally have your back. Oh! Maybe I can get Kiku to distract Arthur while you confess. Hashtag, Team Ivan.”

“Please don’t make a hashtag.”

“Hashtag, Fuck Arthur.”

“Stop,” he rubbed his weary eyes.

“Hashtag, Ivan X Alfred 5ever.”

“Why are you on your phone? Are you… Stop! Don’t tweet these!”

After a bit of wrestling, Ivan was able to persuade Yao not to post anything too incriminating to his social media, though Yao only agreed on the condition that Ivan deal with everything that night. He even snatched his chemistry book—empty of highlights and notes, sadly—which prompted Ivan to pack up and leave, since he clearly wasn’t going to be allowed to get any work done.

Yao said that Kiku and Arthur were already hanging out, so he had Alfred all too himself. Nervous, but hopeful for the healing of their friendship at the least, Ivan sent him a text. As usual, Alfred responded within seconds. He was in the room.

The walk to their dorm seemed to last longer than it ever had, even though the library was only a few minutes away. Ivan stood outside the door for half a minute, trepidation for the coming conversation holding him back from entering. With a deep breath, he said “fuck it”, and threw open the door with a loud slam.

“Dude, chill,” Alfred said, looking completely relaxed on the futon, laptop opened on his stomach.

“Sorry,” he said sheepishly. He turned to close the door—this time gently—before offering Alfred a small smile. “Do you have time to talk?”

“Yup.” He shut his laptop with a small click before sitting up and setting it aside. “What’s up?”

“Well, I wanted to apologize. I’m sorry that I acted in a way that made you think that I was… ashamed of you. I don’t care who you spend your time with—well, that’s not quite true. I care, but not because you like guys, or anything.”

Alfred sat, smiling expectantly. “And…?”

“Uh… And… you should feel free to date whoever you want, and I’ll respect it. Of course, I hope you’ll still find time for me, as… you friend… It’s not up to me who you hook up with.”

His grin was blinding—oh, how Ivan had missed that, how he’d missed being the cause of it—and he spoke. “I won’t make you go on. I know I may have, ah… overreacted a bit. I’m sorry about that. I was in a weird head space, you know? I’d lost a few friends because of the whole gay thing, and I was afraid I’d lose you, too, even though my argument was admittedly shit. But, because of that, I get where you’re coming from. You don’t wanna lose me to another guy, and I don’t wanna lose you at all.” He stuck out his hand. “So, we cool?”

Ivan’s hand instinctively rose, but it froze before they touched. Alfred eyed him oddly while Ivan stared at their open palms, mere inches apart.

“Ivey? You good, buddy?”

He simply shook his head. “No… I’m sorry, I’m not good with this. We’re not ‘cool’.”

“What do you—“

“I can’t stand seeing you with those other people!” he began. His mind was yelling at him to stop before it was too late, but judging by Alfred’s confused and hurt look, he knew he’d already ruined any chance at a simple friendship.

“Ivan, what—“

“Look,” Ivan sighed, lamenting his decision immediately. “Arthur doesn’t deserve you. You shouldn’t be sleeping around with all these awful guys! You’re so much better than that! Than all of them!”

“Uh…”

“I mean, what guy wouldn’t want to date you? But you’re always so hung up on these losers when they don’t text you back, and none of them know how to treat you right ‘cause they don’t bother getting to know you! It’s not your fault, of course, but these idiots look at you and only see a handsome face and they waste your time! It’s offensive, frankly, and I won’t stand for it anymore!”

Alfred’s pace had pinked prettily, and he sputtered. “What—d-dude,” he cleared his throat. “What’s up with this all of a sudden? I’m not trying to be forever alone, you know. You’re so protective now!”

“I’ve always been like this,” he pointed out. “And you misinterpreted it, unfortunately. You were never the problem, it was always _them_ ,” he spat.

“Misinterpret? Then how should I be interpreting it? That you’re just a very concerned friend?”

Ivan frowned, debating his options. “Well, if that works for you, then sure.”

“But… that’s not fair. Can’t you trust my decisions?”

“Of course, if you can find someone worth the dirt on your boots, maybe,” he rolled his eyes, crossing his arms.

“I’m confused,” Alfred said, ever blunt. “Do you… like me, or something?”

Ivan huffed, mumbling under his breath. Alfred took a step forward, and Ivan turned, offering him a view of his side. “I thought you couldn’t read people,” he mused.

“Ivey,” his voice was concerned. “Talk to me. Don’t shut me out. Are… are you gay?”

“No!” he snapped. Alfred flinched, and Ivan faced him, arms extended in an effort to comfort him. “Sorry, that sounded rude. I… I don’t know. I’m confused too. I don’t think I’m… gay, or anything. I don’t notice any other guys. But, you… I’ve always noticed you. How could I not?”

“So, all those times you got mad, you were just jealous?”

“I don’t know… I don’t think I realized it at the time. I only came to this conclusion after we fought.”

“I see.”

Ivan sighed. “I’m sorry. I understand if you don’t want to be friends anymore. That’s fair. I clearly have some stuff I need to work on, I just… I don’t know what’s going on.” He wrapped his arms back around himself, suddenly feeling the urge to cry; he’d never felt this, before, this fear of being unaccepted. Now he was starting to understand why Alfred was afraid to be out to his family—it was terrifying, putting your whole self out there.

Instead of pushing away, however, Alfred enveloped him in a crushing hug. “I’m not gonna kick you out, dude. I mean, the only problem I had was thinking you hated me, and now that’s clearly not the case,” he laughed, trying to make the situation lighter.

“Isn’t it weird, though? I don’t want you to feel pressured in any way.”

He shrugged. “Nah, I don’t think it’s weird.” He pulled back, forcing Ivan to look him in the eye. “I don’t think it’s weird at all.” He shut his eyes then, getting on his tip-toes, placed a gentle kiss to Ivan’s lips.

He stood, frozen, for several seconds, not having any idea what to do. He knew how to kiss of course, but he’d only kissed girls—not that it would be different, he quickly reminded himself—but, this was Alfred… as in the perfect, god-like person he’d somehow come to love despite how completely obnoxious he could be—

And then he was kissing him back, wriggling his arms free of Alfred’s hold to wrap them more securely around his waist. His eyes opened for a moment, and he was graced with that all-too-familiar face of Alfred’s, the face that suggested that he was fully lost in the moment, that he considered the other person to be nothing less than a reverent being… and for the first time it was Ivan who he was worshiping with such a simple touch, yet to him, it was everything. And in that moment he knew that that first time couldn’t be the last, that he needed Alfred’s attention not as a friend, but as a lover, for the rest of his life, if he could; but, he knew he was getting ahead of himself, his thoughts racing onward and forward in all directions, so he forced himself back from the future, back to that moment, back to him kissing Alfred— _his_ , he had to be his alone—and to be being kissed _back_ by Alfred, and he pulled away, the weight of everything collapsing around him.

Both were breathing hard. Ivan didn’t know how long they’d been kissing, nor what was going on in Alfred’s head, though judging by his shocked and hungry and desperate expression, it was all good things, and his heart caught up to his racing mind and all he could do was smile goofily while Alfred started laughing.

Feeling more confident, he ceased Alfred’s laughter with a kiss of his own, this one less chaste but still pure with the burning of his months’ obsession guiding it. Alfred was caught off guard, pushed back slightly, but Ivan’s arms pulled up close while keeping him upright. He moaned, feeling Ivan’s tongue on his lip, which prompted Ivan to deepen the embrace.

“I-Ivan!” Alfred gasped, knocking his head back to capture some air.

“Alfred,” he breathed, voice betraying his excitement.

“Ivan,” he repeated, more sure of himself. He removed his hands from their spot on Ivan’s neck and cupped his cheeks instead. A soft smile, a softer kiss. “I really like you.”

“I love you.”

Where before Alfred’s blush had been subtle, then it bloomed, rapidly covering not just his cheeks, but his ears and even down to his neck. Wishing to hide, he placed his forehead against Ivan’s chest. “Wow,” he said simply. He laughed. “I didn’t think this would happen. You know, I had a big crush on you when we first met.”

“You did?”

“Sure. I thought you were gorgeous. But, you weren’t into guys, I knew, so I settled with just being your friend.”

“Gorgeous?” his tone was full of disbelief. “Me? That’s nonsense. You’re the gorgeous one. You’re perfect. I can’t believe it took me all this time to realize what I was actually feeling. I wish… I wish I’d figured it out earlier, if only so that I could’ve helped you avoid all the pain those other people gave you.”

He chuckled. “Well, maybe this is for the best.” He sighed, suddenly looking sad.

“What’s wrong?”

“Now I have to break up with Arthur. What a drag, I hate breaking up with people.”

“You don’t have to—“

“Ivan,” he interrupted. “You just confessed your love for me. And… I’m pretty close to saying those words, myself. I’d be an idiot not to take this and run with it.”

“I… well. I’m glad to hear that.” He kissed the top of Alfred’s head. “I don’t know if I’ve ever felt this happy, before,” he chuckled.

“Not even when they had that sale on vodka?”

“Oh, I forgot about that,” he smiled, fond but blurry memories appearing. “But, even including that, this is better, by far.”

“You’re so sweet. I never pegged you as a romantic.”

“I suppose you’ll be getting very familiar with this side of me, then.”

“I’m looking forward to it, Ivey.”

They had to part, of course, as much as Ivan would have liked to remain intertwined; hell, he’d have been happy to whisk Alfred away, have him all to himself rather than let anyone else appreciate him. Of course, he was quick to correct that train of thought—Alfred wouldn’t be happy being hidden away. He was a being of light, of warmth, and anyway, it would be unfair to the world to deprive it of him.

Ivan waited patiently for Alfred to return from Arthur’s. An hour passed, then two, then sleep came.

He awoke to a presence in his bed, clumsily shuffling beneath his comforter.

“Hey,” Alfred said. “These beds are really small.”

“Then we’ll just have to get closer,” Ivan mused, a bit sleepy. He pulled Alfred closer, as close as he could, and nuzzled his blond locks, already knowing his scent but memorizing it anyway.

“No complaints there,” he placed his hands over Ivan’s, slightly chilled having just come in from the cool nighttime air.

“Did everything go alright?”

“Yeah, it was fine. Everything’ll be fine.”

“More than fine, I’m sure.”

“The finest,” he sighed contentedly. “I think I love you.”

“Must have been an eventful few hours.”

He chuckled. “Yeah. I did some thinking after I talked to Arthur.” Turning so his face was toward Ivan’s, he kissed his nose. “I’m kinda nervous, honestly, about all this. But, I know that it’s what makes the most sense. I couldn’t imagine myself not being happy with you.”

Ivan’s kiss met Alfred’s lips. “I feel similar, though… perhaps I’d say that I couldn’t imagine myself being happy with _out_ you. These feelings, they’re almost scary, if that makes sense.”

“Well, the hero will be here with you through it all, so don’t be afraid.”

He smiled. “Thank you, Alfred.” Another soft kiss, then Ivan reclined, shutting his eyes. “I love you.”

“Right back at’cha,” he replied. He wasn’t ready to say those words just yet, but his heart soared when he thought them. _Soon_ , he thought to himself. “Let’s move the beds together tomorrow.”

Ivan yawned. “Whatever you want, lapushka.”

Alfred smiled and cuddled against Ivan’s body, and Ivan curled around him as if to protect him. Both were lulled to sleep by the comforting warmth the other provided them.


End file.
